The Bush Administration recently concluded that it isn’t the Cuban government’s police powers that keep Castro in control of the island. Instead, it is gift packages of toothpaste, soap, toilet paper, and other sundries sent by Americans to their family members in Cuba that perpetuate Castro’s iron-fisted rule.
To hasten the fall of the dreaded Castro government, the Bush Administration righteously formulated new rules denying (unpatriotic) Americans the ability to send gift packages of toiletries to their relatives on the largest island in the Greater Antilles.

The House, inexplicably enough, decided to prolong the Communist threat just ninety miles off our shores by proposing an ammendment that would have limited the Administration’s ability to promote democracy by tightening the embargo of Cuba. Before the clearly brain-addled House could further damage the spread of democracy abroad, a roll call vote was taken. Fortunately, there are six more patriots in the House than there are flip-flopping, liberals uninterested in the spread of freedom. The vote came up 210-216 against the ammendment. The Administration’s strong stance against Communism had survived.

True American hero and majority leader, Tom Delay (R-Texas), noted that the Castro regime would surely open gift packages sent to Cubans and pilfer the contents. The pilfered items would then be used to continue the brutal repression of the island’s peace-loving residents. Other freedom fighters in the House noted that America cannot afford to lessen its resolve by allowing Americans to ease the burdens of daily life suffered by oppressed their family members.

Surely, Fidel has once again seen what a strong, resolved, nation America is. He has seen that we speak with one powerful, united voice for freedom and democracy. Castro certainly has nightmares about the unbreakable American embargo and how the people will rise up any minute now and end his brutal rule.