Sarah and I were in Cleveland last weekend visiting her parents. We flew out to surprise her mother for her birthday. While we were there, we also took in the Cleveland Browns game.
At the Browns game, there were some very enthusiastic Browns fans who were very deep into their cups. As the Browns were lining up for their first offensive play of the game, the fans behind us started yelling, “Throw the bomb! Throw the bomb, Butch!” (Butch Davis is the Browns’ coach, for those not in the know.) The Browns did, in fact, throw the bomb on their first play from scrimmage. The play was a 99-yard touchdown completion.
As the Browns lined up for their first offensive play of their second offensive series, the fans behind us started yelling again. “Throw the bomb!” However, one particularly drunk fan decided to embellish that chant a bit. “Throw the bomb! Go for the juggler!” What he meant, of course, was “Go for the jugular!” However, that did not stop Sarah, her father, and myself from laughing hysterically at the idea of going for “the juggler.” I pictured some poor juggler down the field getting tackled out of his shoes by some middle linebacker with a running start.
As we were standing in the TSA-mandated insecurity line at Cleveland Hopkins airport, the large woman in front of me opened her purse to fish around for her photo ID. As she did so, I got a clear view of the purse’s contents which included both cigarettes and an asthma inhaler. That seemed like a good combination: overweight, asthmatic, and smoking.
Me, while waiting in the TSA-fictional-security line in Madison: “It’s probably illegal to discuss what you can’t discuss in an airport security line.”Sarah pointed out how the TSA displays a picture of a bomb on its airport prohibited items display. Yes, I’m sure the terrorists will show up with bombs right out of Spy v. Spy, see the helpful “do not bring a bomb like this on board an aircraft” icon, and turn around to begin the journey home.