Ever since I converted my Schwinn to a single-speed, that has been myprimary form of transportation.

The conversion took place sometime inMarch of this year, and since that time, I’ve probably ridden myMiyata-frame bike only a couple of times. The Schwinn is now fun toride. Removing the completely rusted-out derailleurs improved thefluidity of pedaling an immeasurable amount. Also, if you don’thave to shift (because you don’t have any gears to shift), riding becomeseven more automatic (except for the endless dodging of motorists whoseskill behind the wheel is only matched by their ability to readancient Egyptian hieroglyphs). Beyond the smooth pedaling, and lack ofshifting, the bike is nearly completely silent as it moves down thestreet. The sprocket on the back is a BMX sprocket, and doesn’t make the usualclicking as the bike glides. Also, the tires and rims are softer thanthose on my Miyata, give the Schwinn a much smoother ride. Yesterday and today, I rode my Miyata into work. What adifference! The Schwinn is something like my Chevy Corsica: Notsexy, but it’ll get you there. The Miyata is like a little redsportscar: fast, agile, and responsive. It’s hard to believe Ilet the Miyata sit unridden in the basement for so long.

If you weren’t reading the newspaper closely, you might think that ourPrez, George W. Bush, had gone underground like some sort of Mafiafigure. In reality, he’s not saying much (and staying out thelimelight by traveling to other countries), but his flunkies are certainlycarrying out the conservative agenda while the sub-Boss (Cheney is the realBoss) lies low.

Note to those who insist on publishing and reading stories in variousnewspapers, all with a variation on the following headline:’PEARL HARBOR’ THE MOVIE NOT 100% HISTORICALLY ACCURATEIN ITS PORTRAYAL OF ACTUAL PEARL HARBOR EVENTS AND PEOPLE INVOLVED INTHE SAMEThis may come as a surprise to the vast majority of themass media, but “We knew that.” Thereare two categories of movies: documentaries andnot-documentaries. Documentaries should be close to historicallyaccurate and take few, if any, liberties with the source material andevents. Not-Documentaries is the category into which nearly 100% ofHollywood films are placed. “Star Wars,” “TheCaine Mutiny,” “Sleepless in Seattle,”“Braveheart,” and any of the”Pokemon” movies are not, nor were they intended to be,documentaries. These are movies that run the gamut betweenpure-fantasy and some grounding in facts. If people really need to bereminded of the difference between Documentaries and Not-Documentaries, thenour country is truly as far gone as “The End is Near!” guythinks.